What do people blog about? I don’t know, as it happens. It is a cold, rainy day in rural Ohio, and immediately after driving in to my office to think over the merits of chocolate, peanut butter, and blogging, the pervy music store owner across the street decided to broadcast Christmas saxophone slow jams through this tiny town. There are very few things that will disrupt my concentration more quickly than “O Holy Night” being soulfully rendered on a woodwind. So until I am capable of organzizing real words in a worthy bloggity blog, I will drop a couple of thoughts here like dropping a couple of kids off at the pool.
Things that I believe are worth considering:
Cats wearing tiny pants.
Alligators with dentures.
Balding alpacas experiencing hair-loss only on their heads.
Do we wash pants because they are dirty from the inside out or outside in? And why don’t some people understand that if pants experience dirt from either internal or external sources, they should be washed?
If contemporary Christian music is playing in the woods and no one is there to hear it, does it sound just as terrible?
In describing someone about to open a business, I used the phrase “pregnant with capitalism.” Using medium to large-sized words in a sentence will always make you feel smart.
In America, we often talk about following our dreams and hanging on to our dreams. Last night, some very tiny chickens laid eggs the size of their own bodies, and I felt really disturbed. That’s a dream that I’d like to let go of.
Speaking of eggs. Women think they have it tough. What if we laid eggs? Add that to the list of socially awkward bodily functions, and suddenly all other lady business looks like a stroll in the park—albeit a cramp-crippled stroll of rage through a park with a chipping, lead-painted merry-go-round.
Is anything offensive to a dog?